First-year graduate student in physics with interests in restoring leverage to laborers, not being used like a tool, nor allowing physics to be by applying every tool it has to offer towards the overtaking of the social sciences and aiding in what I'd argue is the approaching of an organizational tipping point in society, the alternative to which is basically everything Hunger Games warned us of. Sounds like a way of saying I don't know what I want to do with my degree. To that I say I doubt on a true psychological level anyone actually knows why they do what they do. But physical sciences are overtaking the social, laborers are losing leverage, and the physics is where it is at, Slowly but surely. Physics is increasingly be applied to economics, politics, and social/ cultural interactions. What some are calling the "big data revolution" is one example and means by which this occurring.
. World class digger on the side during the summers although I am beginning to develop a moral dilemma with the act of digging for a living as I know from experience it is hard work, thus I have a tremendous amount of respect for worms who do it all day long with no arms at all and for whom it can be said that they hurt no one in trying to survive. I am also a boxer on the side with goals of turning pro, that is if I can ever get over my complex of being controlled and/ or scheduling my time with people, but really are the two so different? Obviously (if you've reviewed this site) I have somewhat of a fascination with social agreements and the overall dynamics between people, and why not? Knowing ourselves is our greatest and most underutilized tool.
Equally obvious is that I've lived outside a time or two and yes, I begrudgingly admit that once upon a time I submitted myself to a mission as well until I learned to camp out and quickly lost my tolerance for the restricted autonomy as well as the way program workers and/ or staff inevitably treat people. It is not that these establishments have an inherently malicious intent, rather with more rules, less accountability, and restricted autonomy comes a natural need to control people which often results in a degradation of dignity and respect. In either case it was implausible for me to finish school while trying to abide by 7 pm curfews and enforced chapel services.
But there is another side to the story, and It took me ending up homeless in a state like Oregon to unexpectedly see that there can be a good side to homelessness, that it does not inherently HAVE to be hard, rather PEOPLE and the society we choose to form makes being without formal property ownership hard.
There are three experiences I will share as they are simply relevant to the nature of this project.
. World class digger on the side during the summers although I am beginning to develop a moral dilemma with the act of digging for a living as I know from experience it is hard work, thus I have a tremendous amount of respect for worms who do it all day long with no arms at all and for whom it can be said that they hurt no one in trying to survive. I am also a boxer on the side with goals of turning pro, that is if I can ever get over my complex of being controlled and/ or scheduling my time with people, but really are the two so different? Obviously (if you've reviewed this site) I have somewhat of a fascination with social agreements and the overall dynamics between people, and why not? Knowing ourselves is our greatest and most underutilized tool.
Equally obvious is that I've lived outside a time or two and yes, I begrudgingly admit that once upon a time I submitted myself to a mission as well until I learned to camp out and quickly lost my tolerance for the restricted autonomy as well as the way program workers and/ or staff inevitably treat people. It is not that these establishments have an inherently malicious intent, rather with more rules, less accountability, and restricted autonomy comes a natural need to control people which often results in a degradation of dignity and respect. In either case it was implausible for me to finish school while trying to abide by 7 pm curfews and enforced chapel services.
But there is another side to the story, and It took me ending up homeless in a state like Oregon to unexpectedly see that there can be a good side to homelessness, that it does not inherently HAVE to be hard, rather PEOPLE and the society we choose to form makes being without formal property ownership hard.
There are three experiences I will share as they are simply relevant to the nature of this project.
THE EUGENE RESCUE MISSION
This is the place that originally put this idea into my head. With equivalent day room to dormitory space, enough relatively comfortable furniture for all to fit, with open accessibility (at least to the day room) for most of the day, and with no enforced time limits life in the Eugene mission was somewhat privileged as far as shelters go. I saw people sustaining themselves most entirely off of shared/ re-used goods. With a place to store their stuff and clean up throughout the day you'd be hard pressed to know many were even homeless. People got along more than well - I'd go so far as to say I learned that when the term "brother" gets thrown around by street people as it often does, it is more than washed up alcoholic bum talk. It is a term that gets used when people see a different side to human nature- themselves included.
As for myself I unexpectedly realized that my shame of being homeless dissipated with connection and community. I also realized that life in a mission needed not be so depressing so long as I hit the day labor spot or went to school early in the morning, worked hard, and stayed up with my training (I'd shadow box/ run along the train tracks with weights in my hand after work/ school). Some people had been there for over a decade. This to me says that some people just cannot transition back into the way of living that has come to dominate society today, and they need options.
On the negative side was the restricted autonomy, disrespectful treatment, forced chapel six days a week, and the overall jail like feel to the place (they literally had barb-wire surrounding the entire property), and bear in mind this place is head and shoulders above many missions in the U.S.. No one should be punished just because they cannot afford the American way of life.
As for myself I unexpectedly realized that my shame of being homeless dissipated with connection and community. I also realized that life in a mission needed not be so depressing so long as I hit the day labor spot or went to school early in the morning, worked hard, and stayed up with my training (I'd shadow box/ run along the train tracks with weights in my hand after work/ school). Some people had been there for over a decade. This to me says that some people just cannot transition back into the way of living that has come to dominate society today, and they need options.
On the negative side was the restricted autonomy, disrespectful treatment, forced chapel six days a week, and the overall jail like feel to the place (they literally had barb-wire surrounding the entire property), and bear in mind this place is head and shoulders above many missions in the U.S.. No one should be punished just because they cannot afford the American way of life.
street sweeps in portland
After being in and out of a few places and playing around with the idea of moving to Texas (Dallas is an experience I'll spare you, but just know homelessness can be rough and flat out dangerous in some towns) I came [back] to Portland for a summer class that would get me into UO. It was my first time sleeping outside and I sought what was natural for someone unaccustomed to camping outside; safety in numbers. To cut to the chase this basically equated to sleeping under a bridge. You see Portland prior to the summer of 2013 was unique in the sense that it would allow homeless to congregate in large packs (100+) to find safety in numbers at night without the use of tents. This created all of the dynamics I've spoken of on other pages; trust and camaraderie between street people, the street-punks/ vagrants seemed to be put in check and showed respect as they themselves had their freedom to congregate intact and were otherwise outnumbered by a larger body of peaceful street people seeking refuge, and volunteers themselves would come down unscheduled/ uninvited to hand out stuff seemingly for the fun of it. Simply allowing people to sleep in large packs unobstructed by tents and unhindered by territorial lines helped set the vibe and culture of downtown Portland. I'd see signs about broken spaceships in need of repair being held by homeless who seemed to be more at peace and happy than the middle class walking by them. Alos of note was that the use of the term "brother" was utilized often.
That all changed two months later when mayor Hales (most likely in response to a cry from a select few members of the Portland Business Alliance) initiated his street sweeps in the summer of 2013. The tradition of allowing homeless to camp in doorways of businesses at night (irregardless of whether the specific business minded or not) was outlawed. Within days nearly two hundred people tried to squeeze under a bridge that could only accommodate ~90. Petty skirmishes that happened every 2-3 weeks turned into full blown fist fights where people got knocked to the pavement every 2-3 nights. Within a week I had a knife pulled on me when I tried to take the last spot available which it turned out happened to be next to a 15 year old girl (no one explained this to me). The father and his family had been involuntarily swept out of their spot and forced to be around a crowd of people they did not necessarily choose to be around or trust at all for that.
That was the last I had to do with downtown Portland. A few months later - after doing a last minute 180 degree turn away from the UO I came back to Portland and learned that a kid got stabbed to death under that bridge. As I heard it from witnesses it was an unnecessary evolution of a petty disagreement between kids- one of those things that my experience working the doors at a bar tells me is something which absolutely can be affected by the setting and culture of the incident. After that I took off to the hills and learned to camp out on my own. I learned that isolation and a lack of social capitol make homelessness hard. Without the ability to identify with a pack, shame sets in as you and your life-style contrasts to everything around you. Having little more than a cold bridge to look forward to at night, I struggled with drinking for the first time in my life. I also watched the sense of culture on the streets of Portland change a lot as well as the trust and well-being of those on the streets deteriorate over the next two years. Gentrification, a take-over of the streets by traveling vagrants, and increased crime rates were all over the news. Instead of hearing homeless call each other "brother" or "sister" I heard many accusations of thievery amongst them. All the while I was shaking my head because all three of these things are too often spoken of as obscure esoteric subjects that people as a whole could never possibly master the underlying cause of, yet from a ground level it is stupidly and plainly obvious; we are just pack creature demonstrating pack dynamics.
That all changed two months later when mayor Hales (most likely in response to a cry from a select few members of the Portland Business Alliance) initiated his street sweeps in the summer of 2013. The tradition of allowing homeless to camp in doorways of businesses at night (irregardless of whether the specific business minded or not) was outlawed. Within days nearly two hundred people tried to squeeze under a bridge that could only accommodate ~90. Petty skirmishes that happened every 2-3 weeks turned into full blown fist fights where people got knocked to the pavement every 2-3 nights. Within a week I had a knife pulled on me when I tried to take the last spot available which it turned out happened to be next to a 15 year old girl (no one explained this to me). The father and his family had been involuntarily swept out of their spot and forced to be around a crowd of people they did not necessarily choose to be around or trust at all for that.
That was the last I had to do with downtown Portland. A few months later - after doing a last minute 180 degree turn away from the UO I came back to Portland and learned that a kid got stabbed to death under that bridge. As I heard it from witnesses it was an unnecessary evolution of a petty disagreement between kids- one of those things that my experience working the doors at a bar tells me is something which absolutely can be affected by the setting and culture of the incident. After that I took off to the hills and learned to camp out on my own. I learned that isolation and a lack of social capitol make homelessness hard. Without the ability to identify with a pack, shame sets in as you and your life-style contrasts to everything around you. Having little more than a cold bridge to look forward to at night, I struggled with drinking for the first time in my life. I also watched the sense of culture on the streets of Portland change a lot as well as the trust and well-being of those on the streets deteriorate over the next two years. Gentrification, a take-over of the streets by traveling vagrants, and increased crime rates were all over the news. Instead of hearing homeless call each other "brother" or "sister" I heard many accusations of thievery amongst them. All the while I was shaking my head because all three of these things are too often spoken of as obscure esoteric subjects that people as a whole could never possibly master the underlying cause of, yet from a ground level it is stupidly and plainly obvious; we are just pack creature demonstrating pack dynamics.
camping out for school
In my last year of my undergraduate degree, after making a quick decision to return to Portland rather than transferring to OSU (Corvallis) I faced a last minute choice before classes began; I could pay every dime I had to get into the one area of Portland I could afford (Gresham), take time off from studying so as to work to compensate for this and be able to actually eat food, take more time out from studying to commute two hours per day, and to submit to a part of town I hate being in and where previous experience tells me that I would have experienced a good amount of lethargy in attempting to study. Alternatively I could buy a pick-axe, a tarp, and $1500 in gift-cards to the local grocery store to get me through the quarter (I eat a lot plus being without a fridge gets expensive). I could just carve myself out a campsite on the side of a hill four blocks from school and 200 feet behind the local day-labor office. Knowing it was my last year, that I'd have to take a full load of some of the most difficult courses I'd ever taken (especially considering any classes I postponed were going to come back to haunt me that year), and that my grades in my final year were pivotal to getting into grad school, I chose the latter.
Say what you will, but it worked. Without anywhere to go but school, and with the city of Portland having broken up everyone - though the isolation made it one of my least favorite years of study - I did better than ever before and got into grad school. As previously mentioned in the 'benefits for the middle class' section, I even noticed the lethargy typically experienced when studying in an isolated apartment went away.
I do not see any good reason why something like de-partitioned housing is not available to every college student in the US.
Say what you will, but it worked. Without anywhere to go but school, and with the city of Portland having broken up everyone - though the isolation made it one of my least favorite years of study - I did better than ever before and got into grad school. As previously mentioned in the 'benefits for the middle class' section, I even noticed the lethargy typically experienced when studying in an isolated apartment went away.
I do not see any good reason why something like de-partitioned housing is not available to every college student in the US.
a CHANGE IN PERSPECTIVE
Throughout all me experience, what interests me the most is that I've observed my own perspective of my situation, myself, an those surrounding me to fluctuate according to the environment of it's setting. If the environment is conducive to pack lifestyle, then the natural tendency to behave as pack creatures manifests itself. It can also be said that much of what is observed in society can be explained in terms of the inner drive to identify as members of a pack. My experience left me with a realization that I cannot shake; that this drive is both profoundly powerful and profoundly underutilized by citizens within society.
The concept of property ownership has itself been identified throughout the ages many times as perhaps the single most significant source of faction-ism and war as well as the distribution of wealth among people. At the core of all of this and what I'd argue to be more important than the above is perspective. It is perspective that is most affected by the act of partitioning. We can spend all day striving to change ourselves and improve our lot or our world, but it is all in vain if we cannot address the underlying cause of so much of it; our perspectives. It is a, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" type of situation; which caused the other and which is more worthy of our efforts- changing what we see or changing the eyes we see them with? Much of our energy and focus in solving societal problems attempts the former. It is an outside-in approach which targets individuals and topical effects rather than addressing underlying motivational causes. We target individual actions rather than questioning the society and culture which helped produce them, and in the end nothing really gets solved.
I will iterate the general theme of everything this website is about; the interactions of people are most definitely affected by the environment they are a part of.
The concept of property ownership has itself been identified throughout the ages many times as perhaps the single most significant source of faction-ism and war as well as the distribution of wealth among people. At the core of all of this and what I'd argue to be more important than the above is perspective. It is perspective that is most affected by the act of partitioning. We can spend all day striving to change ourselves and improve our lot or our world, but it is all in vain if we cannot address the underlying cause of so much of it; our perspectives. It is a, "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" type of situation; which caused the other and which is more worthy of our efforts- changing what we see or changing the eyes we see them with? Much of our energy and focus in solving societal problems attempts the former. It is an outside-in approach which targets individuals and topical effects rather than addressing underlying motivational causes. We target individual actions rather than questioning the society and culture which helped produce them, and in the end nothing really gets solved.
I will iterate the general theme of everything this website is about; the interactions of people are most definitely affected by the environment they are a part of.
